Christmas and New Year

The Christmas season is winding down and we are preparing for a new year.  Christmas was a special time spent with loved ones and watching the joy in my children's faces as they opened each and every gift with appreciation.  It's such an amazing time of year.  

Then, I got sick!  I had cold symptoms, a fever, and a body rash.  I spent the first few days in my room and away from the family, trying my best not to pass it along.  It was difficult and made me feel like a bad mom.  I should be there with my family, spending this precious time with them and keeping up with the cleaning.  My husband did the cooking and I appreciate it, but I feel it was an inconvenience for him.  This cold definitely knocked me down, I'm still feeling it, but I'm trying not to let it control me anymore.  I'm still congested and still have that crazy rash but I'm getting through it.  

My husband and I like to make a big purchase together every year and this year we bought a new exercise machine.  It's awesome.  I used it today for a little bit and plan on making it part of a daily routine.  I've made a lot of unhealthy choices this year and my body is showing it.  I need to do better.  I will do better.  

My husband and kids went out of town today to do a ton of shopping.  I was going to join them but having to deal with all this itchiness all I wanted to do was stay at home covered in cream.  I'm also working on some housecleaning.  Cleaning the house that's never clean.  I really have to accept this reality but it's hard to.  I want a clean house.  I hate when my husband points out something that isn't clean.  I want to say, "Okay, shut up and clean it.  Help me out." But I just want to be the one that can get it all done.  I try to get my kids more involved in chores but then I just end up redoing what they did because they didn't do it correctly.  I'm teaching myself to know that everything that needs to get done will get done eventually.  

That's it for now.  Catching up on This is Us, getting housework done and waiting to start some new and old New Years Eve traditions with the family tonight.  

It's Almost Christmas

 I want this blog to be a place where I can share encouragement, inspiration, and even humor.  It's been very difficult lately, with so many from both sides shouting in my ear about their views.  I hear it all the time.  At work, at home, and with EVERYONE I talk to.  It's annoying and it's sad to see just how much this virus has divided people in a country that's already divided.  The maskers vs. the maskless.  The vaccine vs. no vaccine.  The "trust the science" against the "question the science."  It's too much.  In school, wearing masks have become optional but I'm watching as those who choose not to wear one are being ridiculed and punished for it. Whatever happened to THE LAND OF THE FREE?

Anyway, I'm hoping that I can find a way to push aside all the negativity and focus on peace.  My goal for 2022 is to do just that, and make sure my blog is constantly uplifting.  However, I want to be real, too.  I want people to pop on here and read my struggles and say, "Oh, I'm not alone.  She feels just like I do." I feel like I'm called to do just that.  

In the midst of all the chaos we have entered the Christmas season.  I'm not feeling as holly and jolly as I'd like and I still have a few more gifts to buy and wrap, but I am looking forward to the joy and happiness this season brings.  I'm really looking forward to the break.  I need the break.  I can't wait to watch the excitement in my children as they open their gifts and keep in mind the true meaning of this holiday, the birth of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.  He came into the world to give us hope, and a promise of eternal life.  He came to save us from sin and to deliver us from all the evil this world has to offer.  Regardless of how bad things seem to be, I will always put my hope and trust in Him above all else.  

I pray this Christmas that you are able to feel that love from our Savior and the loved ones who surround you.  I pray that the magic you feel through this holiday will live inside you for the rest of the year.  If you experience some kind of hurt during the holidays I pray you find peace through it.  

Have a very Merry Christmas, my readers and friends.  

Good Daughter

 

In November my father had to have three skin cancer spots removed and found out he has Basal Cell Nevus Syndrome, just like me.  It's genetic and, of course, he is who I got it from but I was the first to know.  In those three appointments I took off work to stay with my mom.  Between never having fully recovered from the stroke 10 years ago and now in mid-stage alzheimers it's a very difficult thing to deal with.   I love spending time with her but it's definitely not the life any of us want for her.  

In the last week my dad ended up in the ER three times because of a swollen prostate.  He has a catheter and a Foley bag because he can't pee on his own.  At some point very soon he will be in the hospital having surgery, which means I'll he spending a few nights with my mom.  It's not going to be easy but there isn't any other choice for me.  

Some people have said to me that I'm such a good daughter for taking care of them but I really hate hearing it.  It's not my choice to jump in the car and rush to their rescue when need be.  Just like it wasn't my choice to move out of NY and to PA at the age of 14, leaving all other family members and friends.  My brother moved here and went back.  My aunt moved here and went back.  I had my chance after graduating college but I felt obligated to stay.  It took many years for me to find peace in the move and even though things are pretty good now, I'm still not completely happy.  It wasn't fair what I was put through then and it's not fair what I'm put through now.  Am I a good daughter?  No, I'm an obligated daughter.  I'm a stressed out daughter.  I'm a I-need-to-help-them-because-I'm-the-only-one-here daughter.  Of course, I'm willing to do so but it's not easy, especially when I have a job and kids to care for.  Life can be unfair but it is what it is.  

I'm currently mentally exhausted at just the thought of it all.  

Blessings & Tragedies

 I haven't been so good at keeping a daily post on what I am thankful for.  I am definitely thankful for a lot of things.  Even in these hard times we face, I can find so much to be grateful for.  

I hope all of my reader friends had a great Thanksgiving.  Ours was spent with my mother-in-law and sister-in-law.  The next day we were shocked to find out that my husband's stepmother suddenly passed away.  They moved to Kentucky over a year ago, where she's originally from, so they could be closer to her kids and grandkids.  Her health wasn't always great and we had a feeling something was going on, but we had no idea it was going to lead to this so quickly.  

Pam was the epitome of a southern girl, for sure.  Everything from her accent to the way she dressed.  She was sweet, kind and gentle and lived her life serving in the music ministry.  I never heard her speak a bad word about anyone and there is no doubt she's now singing her heart out in heaven.  

Then the next morning, at 3:30am I received a phone call from my dad that I had to hurry to their house  They live 40 minutes away.  My dad said he needed to pee but it wasn't coming out and he felt like he was about to explode.  Let me tell you, there's no traffic at 4am.  I got there and he drove himself while I tried sleeping on the couch while my mom stayed in her bed.  He came back a few hours later with a catheter and foley back installed.  He's wearing that until Thursday.  If he's able to go again on his own, great, if not he'll most likely need surgery.  I'm praying for the best.  

It's not easy watching as our parents are aging.  It's quite frightening, actually.  With my mom's stroke and Alzheimer's she can't take care of herself and if anything happens to her I'm the only child of theirs here in PA.  It's all going to be left up to me and I'm not sure I'm mentally capable.  Ugh!  It's a lot.  One day at a time, I suppose.

We are now in the holiday season and our decorations have gone up.  It's just going to feel a little different this year.   

Nov 24th Thanks

 

Thankful for this boy who made me a mother 14 years ago.

Nov 22 Thanks

 

Thankful for these quiet mornings before the sun rises and everyone in the house wakes up.   Lately, it's been hard dealing with fighting kids and a house that can't seem to get clean so I started setting the alarm at 5:45am so I'd have some quiet time.  I start the day by having a conversation with God and exercising my body.   Then sitting with a hot cup of coffee in peace until the chaos begins.  

Day 20 Thanks

 So, I'm not good at keeping this thing updated every day.

My girl and I have been sick but I am thankful for negative covid tests.  

Day 16 Thanks

 Thankful for the days I get to spend with my mom.

Day 14 Thanks

 

This photo doesn't do justice of what was actually in front of me.  I am thankful to live in such a beautiful state.  

Day 13 Thanks

 On Christmas 2019 my hubby got tickets to see Lauren Daigle for me and my daughter.   The concert was for July 2020 but I don't have to tell you why that was cancelled.  It was rescheduled, then rescheduled again.  Finally, last night we got to go.  It was an amazing and powerful show.  Lauren Daigle is a contemporary Christian artist and her song You Say can be heard on a lot of regular stations.  We also had a VIP pass to see her in a pre-show and that was phenomenal.  

Nov 10th Thanks

 It's been a rough couple of days.  My daughter has been dealing with some emotional issues and has diagnosed herself with having anxiety (she's only 10).  She's a sensitive girl who is always whining, crying and complaining.   On top of it all there's some boy in her class that's been picking on her and nothing is being done.  The last few days have definitely been hard.  Right now I'm dealing with a tension headache.   I'm at my wits end and I don't know what to do.

So, it's been hard to get my mind to feel thankful but regardless of what my little one is going through I am still very thankful for her.  She is kind and sweet and so very loving.  That's what makes all of this even harder to deal with. 

Nov 8th Thanks

 I am thankful for my job in the cafeteria.   It's nothing fancy and often quite messy and stressful, but it's a lot of fun.  Admittedly, this is the best job I ever had.  

I love that I only work a few hours and can be home when the kids are.  I got this job because it worked best around their schedules.   It may only be temporary but I'm savoring these days.  

Day 7 Thanks

 Today my parents celebrate 51 years of marriage.   They have been through, and continue to go through, rough times that would have separated most couples.  They believe in "for better or worse" and "til death" and I am so incredibly thankful for them.  

4 kids, 15 grandkids and 10 great grandkids (if I counted that right.)

Day 6 Thanks

My son and his team won the 13U championship yesterday.   I'm so proud.   It was an incredible and well deserved experience.   I am thankful for the coaches, the team, and especially for my son who has a love for baseball and works so hard to get better.  

 

Nov 5 Thanks

 

This quote is so perfect for the time we are currently in.

So many things seem unexplainable and leave us to wonder when we'll see the light at the end of the tunnel.  I am thankful that in these dark times God is already ahead of it and will get us through.   His will, not mine.  

Nov 4 Thanks

 

I'm thankful for this guy who came into our lives when we least expected it.  Our friends posted pictures of him on Facebook.  After a month of fostering him after being found on the street they had no luck finding an owner.   With having two other dogs they weren't able to keep him.  I was the first to comment that I would love to take him.  My husband talked about wanting a black pug for a long time.

He's an old guy and would rather sleep than play.  It's okay because he makes a great snuggler.

Thanks Day 3

 

I took this picture this morning at the bus stop.  The neighborhood is filled with trees of many fall colors and there is frost on the ground from our first cold morning of the season.  Winter is coming and soon these trees will become completely bare until new life blooms in the spring. 

I am thankful to live in a place where I can experience all 4 seasons.  I'm not a fan of the cold and as I've gotten older I'm starting to loathe the heat but I'm glad we get the mix.  

Nov 2 Thanks

 Today is election day and even though it's not a presidential election it's just as important. 

So, since it's election day I want to say I am thankful to live in a country where I am allowed to cast my ballot that will have my choice heard.  It doesn't always go how I had liked but I think of the countries who don't have the option at all.  

Giving Thanks Nov 1st

 "Give thanks to the LORD for He is good; His love endures forever," -- 1 Chronicles 16:34

We have entered November, a month where we celebrate Thanksgiving as we reflect on all things we are grateful for.  I decided to pop in this blog every day this month and write something I'm grateful for.  In a time that has been so crazy it's nice to remind ourselves of the good that's still there. 

Today I'll say I am thankful for how faithful God has been.  My husband has spent 20 years at a job he's done well in but there were things that made him unhappy.  I'll spare those details but after a lot of prayer he found a better job.  Today is his first day.

So, I'm thankful how God has answered this prayer and provided my husband with something better.  It also happened at a time when our country is experiencing inflation and leaves us wondering what finances are going to look like in the future.  

Thankful that when one door closed a better one opened.

Busy October

 These October days are just slipping away, as it always seems.  The older I get, the faster time goes.  

The month began with celebrating my birthday.  I'm at that age where a birthday feels like just another day and I don't really feel like aging anymore, but it was a special day spoiled by my family.  My husband made the most delicious chocolate and Reese's peanut butter cup cupcakes.  Oh my!  Seriously, the best cupcakes I ever had.  

My kids continue to be busy with their after school activities.  I would love to have an entire day at home where I can focus on the house cleaning.  There is so much to clean and organize.  I also believe it's time this house saw a major purge.  Thankfully we have a 4 day weekend coming up so that will give me an opportunity to get something accomplished. 

My son is finished with the fall baseball season and the team made it to the championships.  My son played his best season yet and I am so proud.  My daughter danced in 4 showcases, performed in her first district-wide choral concert and a virtual violin concert.  October has definitely been a busy month.  

In the cafeteria we are experiencing a lot of stressful problems that lead into utter exhaustion.  There's only 4 of us, that's how upper management wants it, but the work load we have to do requires more than just 4.  It's too much.  The head cook has been in tears.  We all feel it.  Also, we are running out of supplies.  Every school is.  

I'm feeling exhausted!  Guys, it's only October and I feel already done with the school year.  However, I don't want this school year to end because it's my daughter's last year in elementary school and that is hard for both of us to fathom.  She's been dealing with a lot of emotional issues lately and I just don't know how to help her.  She's been meeting with the school guidance counselor once a week but I'm not sure that's enough.  If you're a believer in prayer please lift one up for her.  

Now we are in the midst of the final week of the month and Halloween is fast approaching.  I enjoy this time of year very much.  Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas.  All fun!  

Hope you're all having a wonderful October!  

Letting Go Of Excuses

 

It's time I let go of excuses.   

It's time to find time in these busy days to exercise.

It's time to put my health and wellness first.

It's time to take a moment from the hectic schedule and just take a deep breath and reflect on the beauty around me.

Life has been so incredibly busy lately.  With a job and two active kids it's hard to find a moment to slow down.  My house looks like an explosion occurred and there's barely time to clean.  I don't even work full-time and those of you who do probably wish you only worked 4 hours a day.  It's not so much the hours but the exhaustion.  Being a lunch lady is harder than you think, especially when there isn't many of us.  

I've also been gaining weight.  Once my clothes started getting tight and I've been getting frequent UTI's (which is sometimes a sign of diabetes) I realize my regret in becoming lazy with it.  I was doing so well for a while and then stopped.  I can't let the excuses of not having time or feeling of being tired stop me from focusing on the importance of health.  

I must dedicate time to exercise for my physical and mental health.  I must work on preparing a healthier meal plan.  I must keep myself busy with getting through the endless pile of chores.  My husband and kids depend on me for a lot of things and those things can't get accomplished if I'm not taking care of myself first.  

Watch out, I'm coming back!  🙆‍♀️

 

September Days Around Here

 "Life starts all over again when it gets crisp in the Fall," - F. Scott Fitzgerald. 

Okay, today is officially Fall so it's time to bring out the decorations and start the morning with a cup of pumpkin spice coffee. 

A lot of people rush to decorate for the season as soon as September arrives but I prefer to wait until the official day is here.  I also keep my American flag theme decor on display from Memorial Day to September 11.  

September means back to school and back to a very hectic schedule.  My daughter started her dance season and has also started taking violin lessons.  My son's Fall ball season is going on, along with boyscouts and guitar lessons.  I definitely love keeping a busy schedule for the kids but am feeling the need for a full day at home to catch up on cleaning and relaxing.  

Last week we traveled to Maryland to watch my Yankees play the Orioles, a first major league game for the kids.  

Then a few days later we were back to a different part of Maryland to see monster trucks in action.  

I've been working extra hours so that makes for a better looking paycheck and it's definitely needed.  Have you noticed the price of gas and groceries lately?   Yikes!  I'll leave this post at that.  Happy Fall y'all!

Ida

 

My prayers are with those in the path of Tropical Storm Ida.  Here in Southern Pennsylvania we are experiencing the remnants of it.  A lot of rain!  School was let out early as the roads were starting to flood.  

I came home and snuggled with this guy and we both fell asleep.   Well, I woke up.  He's still snoring away.  

What a way to start September. 

Back To School

 

Here we are!  First day of 5th grade and the last year in elementary school.  I started the day praying this will be a good year for her because last year was hard on the already emotionally sensitive girl.  

And the boy is starting 8th grade virtually.   It sounds like a meeting is going to be held in September to discuss having the option of masks.  If masks become not necessary I'm not sure if we'll bring him back to brick and mortar learning.   I'd really prefer it that way but it's a big decision.   We'll see how well he does with cyber.  

I hate what this virus has done.  I hate that it's taken lives, I hate the divide it has caused a nation that's already divided enough, and I hate that it's taken away normalcy for kids.  But we can take this experience and learn from it.  

Wishing a happy 2021/22 school year for all!

Pray For the Nation and the World

 Last week was a little difficult.  After we transferred my son back to in-person school the school board decides to require masks.  So, we had to make a quick decision to get him back to cyber because he doesn't handle mask wearing very well.  Then we got a ton of rain which flooded our basement a little bit.  My husband was using a lot of four-letter words while cleaning it all up, if you know what I mean.  This morning my alarm went off at 6:15 and I grumbled at the thought of waking up early to go to work.  I spent a few hours getting things ready in the kitchen for the first day of school on Wednesday as I thought about the overwhelming and uncertain year that lay ahead.  When I came home I had to deal with my poor boy who is suffering with an inner ear infection.  Last night he was in so much pain and had very little sleep.  My husband also had little sleep because of his own pain he's been feeling.  

I could go on and on about things going on right now.  

Then I think about what is going on in the rest of the world and my problems seem so miniscule.  I try not to watch the news anymore but I do know about what's going on in Afghanistan right now and it's scary.  There are other countries going through a lot of tough situations.  Here in this country there are people dealing with so many problems.  The west has been experiencing fires while the east has been getting way too much rain.  

I pray for this crippled world and a country that seems to be going under faster than you can say HELP.  I can share my views and I can say who I feel is to blame but it's not going to fix the problems, is it?  All I can do is pray.  Pray for our nation and pray for the world.  We need Jesus now more than ever!  

Splishing and Splashing

 When we put the pool in the backyard my son put the dog in to see if he can swim.  Naturally, he started moving those front paws quickly doggy paddling his way to the edge while his backside was slowly sinking down.  He's definitely not going to beat Michael Phelps Olympic record and he won't mind.  

Murphy enjoys eating, sleeping, and snuggling.   He does not like swimming.  

Knoebels 2021

 We made it to Knoebels Amusement Park on Monday.  With only one week to go before school starts we wanted to make this trip.  We love this park so much.  Free parking, free admission, and we can bring our own food.  The prices of the rides went up a little but it's still so much cheaper than Hershey Park.  

She's 10! And Baptized!

One decade!  It went by so fast.  Over the weekend my daughter turned 10.  I just can't believe it.  She celebrated with three of her best friends who slept over.  They had so much fun together decorating cupcakes, painting nails, playing dolls and swimming in a large blow up pool my husband bought for the occasion.  

This girl is a mixture of both sassy and sweet.  She's very sensitive and emotional, and that makes for a lot of exhausting moments.  However, she's a total mama's girl and loves spending every moment with me.  She's caring and loving.  

I can't believe she's 10 years old and going into the 5th grade.  I do feel blessed to have her in my life, despite those emotional challenges.  

The night of her birthday was also super special because both her and her brother got baptized.  This is something they had been wanting to do for a long time and I wanted to make sure they completely understood what this meant and why they were doing it.  Growing up Catholic, I was brought up believing that babies should get baptized.  Then in my adult years, I learned about "believers baptism."  This is an outward expression of our inward faith.  Having already given our lives to Christ we are showing others what we committed too.  It symbolizes our belief, just like a wedding band symbolizes the commitment we made to our spouse.  

I'm so, so proud of them!  After my daughter finished she said, "I want to do that again!"  

 "So in Christ Jesus you are all children of God through faith, for all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ" -- Galatians 3:26-27